WoNNe'theFREAK

2009-08-22T00:38:00.003+08:00

It's been awhile i didn't update..
due to dance dance dance..

Ok let's start with my daily life,
been busy with teaching, rehearsals and shows.
what i could not forget is spending time with the pink blood cells.
we need to catch up with each other especially UMMAIRAH.
ok? (:

As you know,
all my personal messages and nicks have been the same for the past months.
all i could explain is about love that never happens.
what more could i expect? keep stabbing behind my back.
i had enough all this, i just want something different and new.
not what i get everytime from you.
i realize what i've done for you is just a waste of time and effort.
you gave me the trust, but you don't even treasure mine.
what more do you expect from me?
what else satisfy you?
and all the evidence i saw and i caught you red-handed,
you ignore and think that it never happens.
i'm not dumb as what you think.
remember i went through this several times.
i wonder how long can you do this to me.
what comes around, comes around.

and for you, _ _ _ _
you think you know everything?
you think i need to get my facts right?
think again.
how about yours?
your worthless words never ever hit me.
and you think you have the right to say about me n him?
what's wrong with you?
urghh.

2009-07-15T01:38:00.005+08:00

[VERSE 1]
Well I wonder could it be
When I was dreaming 'bout you baby
You were dreaming of me
Call me crazy, call me blind
To still be suffering is stupid after all of this time

[PRE-CHORUS 1]
Did I lose my love to someone better
And does she love you like I do
I do, you know I really really do

[CHORUS]
Well hey
So much I need to say
Been lonely since the day
The day you went away
So sad but true
For me there's only you
Been crying since the day
The day you went away

[VERSE 2]
I remember date and time
September twenty second
Sunday twenty five after nine
In the doorway with your case
No longer shouting at each other
There were tears on our faces

[PRE-CHORUS 2]
And we were letting go of something special
Something we'll never have again?
I know, I guess I really really know

[CHORUS]
The day you went away
The day you went away

[PRE-CHORUS 1]
[CHORUS]

[BRIDGE]
Why do we never know what we've got 'til it's gone
How could I carry on
The day you went away
Cause I've been missing you so much I have to say
Been crying since the day
The day you went away

The day you went away
The day you went away

*red: really what meant to me now and how i really feel. The day you went away.. I will wait till the end of the day..

2009-06-19T02:58:00.004+08:00

woow! since long that i've not been updating my blog. been busy with dance dance and dance! so here we go...

Lately, been doing shows, classes to teach and preparing for JIM BEAM HIP HOP DANCE COMPETITION. my schedule was superrr pack till i have no enough time to sleep and be home to help my mum to do chores. *i will do chores soon enough mum till i have my off days for dance*

i myself didn't even have time to catch up with my other friends. been seeing elly and vega most of the time and they are always there for me when i'm in need. thanks dearests i love you. alsoo to the SCUMBAGS to occupy my night lepaking time, thanks guys! (:

As for my love life, it seems to go away and i dont even want to think about it. cause it feels so angry when i wanna start another relationship. i feel so terrified and hurt about the past and stuff but it really doesn't matter anymore. what really matters the most is, my friends who makes my everyday life go wilddd and fun! :D

But sometimes i do need somebody to love and care for. and it seems the right time is not yet come. will see...

(:

2009-04-14T04:08:00.002+08:00

'Life is so much miserable right now. i just want the best out of the bestest. the most perfect things that i could ever had. but everybody is not a perfectionist, right? it seems hard to understand and decide for yourself. what most i can do now is rest and live my life with a smile.'

you
the least i need from u is to tell me the truth, needs and love. but right now, is really in a mess now. i could only give you the chance that you needed for a very long time. and what you are saying now is something that a human would never say cause every human needs love. i just need your attention and understand what situation im in now. and also you know what is the only precious thing that i need from you only. thousand times i have say it but you couldnt take my words. you ignore. i understand is not easy for you and to me too. but when time slowly past it will.

trust and lying is two different things you should know. it doesnt match in one meaning. cause of these we dont ever workout. dear, it takes time to forget and forgive about the past. so i tought you are ready. but now you feel so regretted that you taken back on me. then, you say all this cause it still lingering on your mind. how could you!

im trying my best as i could that i would give you everything you need, but is not enough to you. so i just need your attention and speak out from your mind what you really need and what you want. that's all.

now, let us rest and cope with the things that we needed to do. whatever it is, will wait...

2009-02-17T07:16:00.002+08:00

To me friendship is a never ending connection. but is all mixed up and different with these kind of 'typical' friends that i have. they are once my good friends, till bitching starts. bitch to my other friends about what i have, what i treasure and lost and what i get in return. why are you being so mean? cruel? jealousy? or what? am i not being fair to you guys? and what did i do to you before? i have NOTHING against you all. but so much called as a friend uh? i really don't want to make such a big fuss about bitching and stuff. but i just don't understand. i'm being nice to you and in return you are being two-faced or for the sake of being friend with me? WHAT'S ALL THIS?? if i ever did anything wrong forgive me. i just don't want to have anything against in this world. now, you guys get what you guys wanted. fame! love! more friends! and what do i get? NOTHING! i'm not being jealous or whatsoever, the problem is why all this affect me suddenly? WHY?!!! sighh.. i blog this cause all the things i really treasure is fading and running away from me. the one i really love and friends.. i just want them back where how it suppose to be. but now i can't turn back. you guys GOT IT! congratulations! you win! so what's next? DUMP ME?! i'm a stranger to you guys. go ahead.. celebrate what you have now and don't give a FUCKING CARE to talk to me about this. i guess you know who you are. is not only one person but more than one.

As for you, i had enough seeing everything. i have nothing much to say. like someone says to you, i forget my roots? hmm.. let it be. just say what you want to say. what you want to label me?! go ahead. and please, if you ever want to come back to me..sigh.. i guess u wont then. u are leading a happy life. =) 'just erase all your past okay?'.i guess this will be my last post about you. and all we had i really treasure it all. and the picture in your wallet, throw it away! i don't want to see that picture anymore in there. it disgust you... remember what i say, i will never ever leave you here......... *hearts*

2009-02-15T18:35:00.004+08:00

I guess i wasn't strong enough to see what happened. i cried all the way home after seeing you went in. my friends, calm me down. i'm so thankful to them for accompany me and walk all the way from lucky plaza. thank you! the moment i reached home, i cry and i cry and cry... keep thinking what's wrong with me? why can't i make a mindset that you are with someone. but you say, i force u to move on? sighh.. but whatever it is, i'm happy for you and mell. at last you guys are together. is been a long time right? that you are waiting for this moment. sighh i'm happy for you!

About me and aimm, people out there, we are just friends! FUCKING friends u heard that? and dont just accuse just like that. cos we dance together now or whatsoever or you see us outside. we dont switch boyfriends. PUH-LEASE! and about aimm's boots(elaborate, white hi-cut puma shoe), i was the one who want to borrow from aimm because i'm having a photoshoot next week and what aimm say use it and let it season. u guys get that? if you don't, FUCK OFF.

I'm so sorry to interfere, and i'm glad you are happy now. and im gonna force myself to move on. i love you so much.......

2009-02-12T02:55:00.003+08:00

Well too much to type about..

Lets start with my love life.
To update you guys, i've been single for two months? yeah! okay i know thats not long enough. but i've been patience about it. patience about waiting for someone that i really wanted. you know is hard and painful when u hear a lot of things going on, gossips, bad comments that i received. whatever it is i just accept what meant to happen. cause i've been thru it all this time. hatred, antis, lust... whatever! really, i just accept what they wanna talk about me. cause i'm just hawt?! LOL okay i'm just kidding. but what i wanna know is, anyone out there understand what im going thru now? sigh.. VERY COMPLICATED! so much things have being repeated and repeated. what more? to repeat once more? just hate it. i always be back to square one. no changes. what i want is just someone to guide and love for who i am. not for money, not for fame, not for sex! sighh..

DANCE
Phew, a lot of effort i've been putting into it. and i'm achieving bit by bit. Funkamania XIV, i with my crew, FANTASTIC REMIX won 3rd! yeah! i was so unexpected. and for myself and for the crew, we did on our own. i'm proud of us! wee! and we did well dearests. love you all! and now, upcoming competition is, MDIS Competition at Commonwealth campus(Street X's,i guess thats the name), Danceworks at PLAZA SINGAPURA on 7th march(FANTASTIX, fantastic crew boys featuring some of other dancers) and groove in the west with DYK on 14 march. Do support us and myself okays! your presence is much appreciated. will update more about it. and people thanks for all the comments. love you all. wee! =D

Family
Now, i feel like im so separated with my family. so much apart. sometimes we fight over a small thing but i manage to calm down myself cause i know we dont communicate that much for quite some time. no time for them. sighh.. i should make a dinner or an outing with them. my treat! haha. but not now, too much things been going on. and i'm so glad that my parents now understand about what i'm doing cause this is for my own good. i told them i wanna make DANCE as my career. love you all!!!

Myself
Now, i have to achieve want i really want to achieve in dance. Love, it will come when the time comes. For valentine, i dont even have one. i guess is my luck. sighh..

I will update more soon okays. ! sorry for the late updates. bye bye! =D

2009-01-02T00:08:00.004+08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR, 2009!

To plan a new resolution and wishlists for myself this year. Is gonna be a different year. A very busy year! I have to set my mind carefully and go to a right pathway. Alot of achievements and plans to make and organise for myself.

Achievements

Scholarship in JITTERBUGS.
Go to Oschool classes for hip hop.
Achieve at least 3 placing for competitions.
Get to Funkamania Finals.
Danceworks*.

Wishlists

A fine love.
Two hi-cut shoes.
A cap that can 'fits' me.
A very high class handphone.
A project shop bag.
Tops and bottoms.
A mp3 or ipod.

Will update more about the acievements and wishlists...

Countdown was great! I really had fun throughout the whole event at woodlands with my friends. But as for the show, it was really a cock up but we made it through. So last minute. haha. Friends keep giving me 'drinks' like gulps or sips. After the event i was somehow high after taking a nap. So then i went home.

You,

I just can't describe myself right now. What i have to do and what i must not do. Is all complicated. When the time comes, it comes. For love, i do love you. Is a brand new year and i want something different. What i meant different is a fine and really into relationship. Like i say,

' I label you my hero and i will give you my all.'

2008-12-20T23:28:00.006+08:00

Too much explanations, too much reasons and too much being the spare. i realised, in life you yourself have to decide what you want to be and what you deserve the best. is all in here, the heart. but not all the time that you think is the best for you.

"This is not me?! i'm a different person last time. a better one?"

I have to let it out till you could hear me here. all the things that you couldn't understand.

Firstly, every sacrifice is really not a BIG deal to you.

Secondly, when friends comes by you won't EVER think i'm exist.

Thirdly, MOST of the time i'm with you and why must you control.

Fourthly, the past still being REPEATED till now.

Fifthly, you start to love someone about 5years ago. still u can say u don't even know how to show love and affection?

Sixthly, tell me lust or love that you will ever think of first in relationship?

Seventhly, won't you ever stick to one for all the 'nights'?

Eighthly, i did say to your friends about us cause there's no other way that i can talk you so maybe they can.

Ninethly, from today onwards i won't ever come back to you but in alternate and will take a long time for me to heal.

Lastly, i'm just a spare to you, right?

There's more... but i won't go to the extend of it. For now, i'm moving on.

'Whatever it is, i do keep you in here no matter what happens even if i do have someone else.'

2008-12-16T13:48:00.011+08:00

CONGRATULATIONS!

We made it to be CHAMPION! The two days practices with just one over night practice is worth and paid off. all were last minute thing but we pulled it through together. That is , me, gino, karel, gico and amin spears. not to forget, fairul and benjy. fairul did the last minute mix n actually stay up for the night with us just to finish the mix. as for benjy, thanks for everything during the night at your house. we really appreciate it alot. and also your cooking! hahahaha. not forgetting amri,irshad and kay kay for the audition round.

and, we gonna perform at SINGAPORE INDOOR STADIUM for the Slingers on 4th January 2009 most probably. :)

go,go,go FANCREW!

2008-11-27T04:11:00.007+08:00

You came back for love. i'm surprised! i'm happy! but one thing still remains in my mind, are you the one that i've been wanting for from you? the one that you promise me? i will wait and see how it comes along. for now, i'm glad you came back.

You went KL yesterday till this sunday. i'm gonna miss you like hell. but you have fun, okays? and i will too. do take care of yourself cause i won't be there to see what will happen. and please you know what i hate if something happens, right?

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

For myself, i have alot of things i have to settle on my own. i can't depend on others. matters that nobody could understand. problems between me and 'god'. work have to be done before it have to be shown. it all includes in dance, friends and family. somehow, this won't be an ending for me.

Like some people like to bad mouth, you will get it from me one day. i mean, you think you are the best, uh? you can get more than i do, uh? bullshit. let's see who can get the best. and all you could ever think of is SEX bitch. is sex so important to you? not that i want to say bad things about you, but you did ruin my relationship once. i'm really not finished with you cause you did dump alot of innocent guys too. and you confronted me and say,"ouh, i did nothing. really!..........".

YOU ARE REALLY A SON OF A BITCH!

to be continue...

2008-11-22T15:55:00.005+08:00

IHateit.

Through all the time being suffering, there's so much things i've learnt in life. get the one you really need, not only about what you want. don't ever force yourself to it. it really hurts alot when you did. i've sacrifice alot in many ways but it didn't turn out good. what i really need now is friends. but do you think is best for me stay in this way? sometimes i hate it too when i really need someone to care and love for who i am.

I never did ditch anyone but i will if it does. but all now come to a conclusion. no point doing it. what i'm saying now is i have to stop all this nonsense. no point trying but if someone get in the way, i guess that will be my lucky day!

Since the day you ditch me, i've been too soft-hearted to just forgive and forget. but i was wrong. cause is been more than a time. i'm not putting you in the blame. but for what i see, what's wrong and what's right, i guess u did more than what i expected.

It all comes through you. "gian". understand? find out.

" what i need now is you, i wanted you.❤ "

2008-11-03T17:14:00.003+08:00

HEY PEOPLE!

HERE'S MY NUMBER,

83545453!

*only message*

2008-10-29T18:19:00.011+08:00

i've been crying and crying all day and nights for you. i called you, message you but you didn't even reply. almost 3days.! why? what's wrong with me? i didn't even hurt you sayang. can't u just tell me the truth and everything. it really hurts inside me.i suffer alot! u know, alot!! but i do still love you cause i know you are the only person that make me smile so wide. i don't ever regret to be yours. but one thing i dislike is, you like to keep it from me. alot of things that u've done.

you said, you try to change but it seems not. i dunno! im really confuse about you now. but whatever it is, i just want to be yours forever. i know i'm still young. i'm just going turning 17. but inside here, maturity is in me. i know, is hard for you to believe what i had promise and everything what i do. me too! is hard for me to believe you. cause it did happen again. i know relationship doesn't go that perfect enough right? but i just want the best of you.

all the questions, messages that i gave you, ive been asking for quite alot of times. i know is IRRITATING, but this is me. i really care about you that's why.if not,if i don't love you or care about you, i will just leave you like that and i will just go with someone else. but i didn't. i even waited for you the whole night since midnight near your house till 9am.! i waited and waited but you didn't even appear. i was thinking about you the whole night. try something to get through you but i can't. with all my effort! but i falied. i love you so much.! i don't even dare to hurt you. i really don't have anyone now except you to wipe my tears out. to kiss my lips. to make me smile again.

we are going to 5months. i'm glad cause this is my longest relationship. and people been telling and asking me why u have such short relationships?i kept quiet. for you, i've taken alot of patience. you didn't even notice about it. i was expecting that we would be happy all this time. but i guess you are not happy enough? what else you need? what else you wish for? i will just do it. for the sake of the one i only love.

i can't sleep properly, i can't think properly. i'm sick too cause i miss you! come back when you are ready for everything that we wish for...

"the sweetest sadness in your eyes."

2008-10-12T19:24:00.005+08:00

HAPPY 4TH MONTHSARY,BUSHUUK!

ON THE 11 OCTOBER 2008

The day on 11 October 2008(Saturday),will be kept and remembered.

The day u make me surprised.

Presents from you are the most biggest gift i ever had!

The movie we watched,HOUSE OF BUNNY,

was hilarious and sexy.

But one thing i remember about the movie is,

to be your ownself cause that's how your loved ones loves about you.

No matter what you are,bad or good,

humans sees you as an unique person.

That's how i see you now MAZIE.

With all the figthing and quarrelling,

I guess some parts of us have to change.

Like you say, we are not PERFECT!

From heart to soul,from soul to you,

The only perfect human i love is you!

I LOVE YOU,SAYANG!

2008-10-02T16:52:00.003+08:00

Is been a long time that i've not updated my blog. People all around asking me why and i've decided to blog it all NOW!

Is been a few months and alot of things have been going on with ups and downs.

With FRIENDS, to my secondary mates, i'm sorry for not been meeting you guys for a long time. i know i've been busy with dance, MATAIR, and stuffs. i wanna say sorry and we will be going out next week kays for raye. Is been a long time sehh. i miss you guys! =D to all my dance mates, i guess i'm off now to stop dancing for awhile. cause of me i guess alot of things been going on and stuff for FANTASTIC CREW. or maybe even i will just continue with my own group. i dunno, i have to figure it out carefully.. whatever it is i love you guys!!! especially to Abg Ewan, for all his effort and patience, teaching and i thank you! i love you abang..=)

With MICKEY, lots and lots of downs we had but we had never gave up for ourself. That's why we are what we are now. Is going to be four months for us next week on the 11 October. The fighting, quarelling, punching, kicking, head banging, crying and shouting all make sense right now.! We love each other so much till we actually did that? waw. Alot of sacrifices, that we made for each other and i appreciate it.. The T-shirt you bought especially for me was unexpected and now i really know how much you treasure and you yourself know what is relationship right now? haha, don't worry kay sayang! i will guide you.. All the promises we made i hope we don't break it and i know especially me! hehe.. i'm sorry about the other time. it was a stupid decision. With all the love, sacrifices, spending on cab for almost 30dollars just to meet you is not a waste! All being paid back. I wont' say that we will be longlasting but i will say we will go on with our own will and there will be lots of things we will know about each other and alot of things that we have to go through.. i love you! muahss =B

With FAMILY, i have been quarrelling with my parents all the time. Now, i have to make a difference during raye to apologise to them and forgive all my sins and they did. I love you MUM & DAD! all the laughters and crying makes me so happy! i will never forget the moments during raye. To all my siblings, i love you guys. whatever it is i will never forget u guys cause you guys whose the one been taking care of me and respect as your brother. I appreciate it.. to my family, if i'm gone sooner than you all, i just hope you will forgive me for everything i did and i know you can live without me.. you still have the others kay? *cry*

Dedicated to all, do forgive me for all my mistakes. Hurting or bad mouth or whatsoever you are not happy about it do forgive me. If still you can accept it, do tell me and we will solve it. Is a new year for me and i'm changing for the better.. and to all, Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri Maaf Zahir Dan Batin! =P

My last wish till the end of my life.

2008-08-20T10:43:00.003+08:00

To anyone who dares to disturb my RELATIONSHIP and ask something desperate, you better watch out! i hope you know who you are. is the past but it keeps reminding me, so back off! i LOVE mickey so muchh! i just don't want to lose mickey soon. because i know, soon you gonna leave cause of marriage. but i know not too soon i guess but it will happen though.. sigh, i guess i think so far till im paranoid right now! and dear, im sorry if i shouted or scold you for no reason. because i just want things to be perfect for us. till you gonna leave from me. i have so much things to say, so much things to show it to you but let me do it at a time. i just want to spent my entire life with you if there's an opportunity for me.! but i guess it will be impossible? everytime you gave love, i feel homely with you around. but like i say i guess im not the one for you till the end of your life? but, sacrifice do take note. so, my wish is to live with you till the end of my life. whatever sins that we make i still want to live with you forever...

2008-07-22T14:38:00.010+08:00

This is WHAT i have now in my life.

It comes once in a lifetime, & i do treasure it the most. :))

but

'It keeps inside 'here' where no one will ever find cause you are the only one.'

Any decision that we make, it will never change.

.Mickey Mouse.

P.S: Don't leave me no more and i FUCKING care for you!

As for MYSELF.

Alot of things that i need to backup. The things that i have to succeed first then aything else. i have been pulling myself down most of the times. Is time for me to prove them wrong on what im doing is right. Soon im working and as for dance im taking a break.(guess so) Too much commitment right now. School, dance, friends, family and add for it is work. What am i looking forward now is a time to be with you.

-to be continue-

(i love you bachinn!)

2008-06-19T08:37:00.002+08:00

Stay With Me

[Aundrea]
Raindrops fall from everywhere
I reach out for you
But you’re not there
So I stood waiting in the dark
With your picture in my hand
Story of a broken heart

[Chorus – Aundrea Only]
Stay with me
Don’t let me go
Cause I can’t be without you
Just stay with me
And hold me close
Because I built my world around you
And I don’t wanna know what it’s like without you
So stay with me, just stay with me

[Dawn]
I’m trying
And hoping for the day
My touch is enough
To take the pain away
Cause I’ve searched for so long
The answer’s clear
We’ll be ok if we don’t let it disappear

[Chorus – Dawn lead with harmony]
Stay with me
Don’t let me go
Cause I can’t be without you
Just stay with me
And hold me close
Because I built my world around you
And I don’t wanna know what it’s like without you
Stay with me, just stay with me

[Bridge – Dawn lead with harmony (D. Woods)]
I’ve searched my heart over
So many, many times
No, you and I
Is like no stars
To light the sky at night
Our picture hangs up to
Remind me of the days
You promised me, we’d always be
And never go away
(That’s why I need you to stay)

[Chorus – All (Dawn lead and adlibs)]
Stay with me
Don’t let me go
Cause I can’t be without you
Stay with me
And hold me close
Because I built my world around you
And I don’t wanna know what it’s like without you
Stay with me, just stay with me
(Oooh, oooh, don't leave)

[Outro - Aundrea]
So I stand, waiting
In the dark

-end-

it happens & i'm not gonna stop ! loves (:

2008-06-13T13:28:00.002+08:00

UPDATING SOON.

Busy with dance and stuffs.

You you you!! :))

you know who and what i mean!

2008-05-23T11:57:00.007+08:00

F.Up Crew

F.Up Crew & Limited KX'S

Limited KX'S

~Bushuk & Buubuu~

Buubuu~

~Bushuk

Dance Xplosion 3- We did our best though even there is a least of co-ordination. But I'm happy that we made it through. After the prelims, all were very not in the mood. I told them a lot of times," Is ok guys, at least what I have to do is done now. No worries, I'm happy!".

F.Up Crew- We made it to the top 10 videos babes! I'm so happy and my effort paid off at least. For now, lets vote people. Our affliates, do vote for us as much as you want! the link is, http://www.neartsfest.com.sg/heartlandmusical_voting7.htm . Guys, if we really went through the finals, we will show what are we really are! Don't give up already, keep voting... *smile*

Buubuu- Congrats of making through the top 10 videos! jyeah. Anyway, I'm sorry this while I've been not in the mood and everytime I always make you angry without any reason. I guess I just can't control my temper. I'm sorry! Sometimes i feel i rather 'die of asthma' than someone shot at me! I just can't stand what I've been scolding you because to me I really feel bad about it. *just beat me hard!!* Thousands apology buubuu!! *cry*

Myself- My body start to ache back since the last practice of skm prelims! Now is getting worst. The position I always in always have a change on it because I'm not STRONG ENOUGH!!! I guess nobody understand what am I saying. And yes, I do hate people talking bad about especially about my health. Is not me that I want but god give it to me! What do you expect? Is not a play a fool game! I just hate it. You know, I have to bear with it till i DIE!! sighh... And during practices I do have asthma attacks but I just don't show it! Why must people play around about it. I want to ignore but is too much and if i really DIE cause of it, can you answer it? huh? Stop it la! It really hurts me. Whatever it is, i don't hate anyone but I'm just telling you how bad it is...

p.s: I do treasure my buubuu, friends, family but myself i treasure it more than anything else in this world!

2008-05-04T20:31:00.009+08:00

D'Star Crew show at TJC.

Happy Birthday Ayeen!

Karmasutra are love by me!

Buubuu and baby Bushuk!

Families... xD

Chef of the day.

Affliates and Ayeen.

What's that buu?haha.

DYK, X'S FUNK, RAGE and Ayeen.

Limited Edition and Ayeen.

TJC Show- We did great for the show even if it is quite a last minute practice! Is super dope yeahh! So, I love you guys... and I'm so happy to have the chance to dance with you all! Let's bring us together to a further step! xD

Ayeen's Birthday Party- By the way, sorry ayeen, wawan lambat update! haha. To all the people who attend the party, i have so much fun and laughters! Cleaning up the mess after the sabotage and thanks to the people who sabo me like few times especially aimm and sue. Aimm with the chilli and sue with the water baloon and with her basin. LOL! Me, being the chef most of the time!! hahaha.. Is been a long time I have this kind of outing... You guys make my day! 'hari tu jer!'. LOL. jkjk! and to Ayeen, this is the first time i celebrate your birthday, I just hope you been having fun the whole day and night with us! And dear, you really look gorgeous with that dress! Stay strong kay dear. If you need help or someone to talk to or even to laugh with, I'm always here for you! MWUACHS~

Buubuu- One month is coming around the corner. Since the day we have been together, so much love been reveal! The moments we had will never be forgotten. It always been kept right here in my heart. To us or anyone, I guess one month is not a big deal but it does to us and it keep going stronger and stronger after day by night. Even a week without seeing you around, just keep in mind, I'm there just standing beside you cuddling... hehe! I.LOVE.YOU! mwuachs of love~~

Dance Explosion- Is been a stress week and we left two weeks before prelims. We are gonna do our best and show what we have! Thanks to Mas, Ayul, Haiqal, Ryna, Ling, Fir, Aimm, Wan, Daen and Shahrul to make this thing work! We call ourselves 'F.UP'! Lets do our best!!! jyeah xD

Myself- There's a lot of things going on now. With school, dance, family, friends and Buubuu. Is been this way every single day. Is my daily routine. I never get bored! This is the way i want it to be. =D

[to the taggers who wanna make up stories and use someone's name better fuck off! i don't have to say it once again]

2008-04-27T00:18:00.006+08:00

=the ghettos=

I never felt the love is becoming stronger and stronger,
each day i remember you it always touch my heart and i say i do love you so much,
whats come around you fail to take me down,
and so i fail to stop making you laugh,
whats the past is the past,
whats now you have me now, don't you?
all these memories and time was such not a waste,
i treasure it a lot, buubuu!!
~iloveyou~ ~mwuachss~

2008-04-17T16:47:00.004+08:00

My life moves on...

I've started school since 14 April 2008 at ITE Simei. It is a great school and i did make alot of friends even till i walk pass somewhere in the school and unknown people say,"hi,wawan!". What the hell. LOL. Cehh popular or what! But then i started to feel boring sometimes because of the teachers. Even if it is only the first week. So, soon will be busy with school and dance. Because i join hip hop dance there. Even i did sig up for singing club too! Entah boleh nyanyi ke tak and can cope. LOL

Next, about my BUBU! I'm attached back with bubu on the 14 April 2008 when in the ITE Simei dance studio. I was touched and aww because what bubu did was cute and i am surprise. because i did say i want 14 that we can be together. i wasn't forcing you but you make me happy! Since before i do love you alot bubu! I just hope we will never repeat our own mistakes and hope we can last long. I just wish that. okays bubu?!! mwuachss~~ hehe

April n 16 2008, i, ayeen, andreas, wan, zu and the simei girls did a show at ITE Simei for the April intake programme. Even it was last minute we did great guys! Soon we guys gonna open a new group in ITE Simei. Yeahh! Gonna be alot of fun and excitements. Woohoo! And soon we will meet everyday in school. xD

And at last i found my bestfriend, EYIIN!! I MISS HER SO MUCH AND BADLY!! xD

For now, i guess i will update more though cause of everyone was asking me many times! hahahaha. Soon babes~~

[ Note: DYK Crew, is on pending to join dance explosion. YEAHH! ]

2008-03-24T15:12:00.011+08:00

Let's start with YOU. Since the day I've known you, I really deeply fallen in love with you. but conflicts start without an ending, I realise you better. It doesn't really matter, but the words you have given is just so meaningless right now when I think about it again.

What are you thinking actually? What are you giving me? Is it true or just false. Or something that is not related to it. I don't really understand you actually. I tried, again & again. But, it seems the second chance is burned just like that.

A replacement that i can say, uh? I keep crying for you, searching for you but you don't even care that my love is bleeding burstly ! What do you have is just miracle and soon it will go 'poof' ! But when you needed someone you came back to me? Toy,uh? Please, make up your mind, dear. What you really want? Don't let me cry for you again. Is so painful.

Friends asked me each time whenever I'm with you but in the state of breaking up or conflicts. Is so hard to explain to them and I just don't want people to look down on me when it comes to relationships. What will they say if they found out if I'm always been this way?

"Wawan is not a good boyfriend for anyone. Every relationship he has he will always stay till like at least less than half a year !Wawan don't really know what's love and how to take care of his partner,uh!"

Hey that is BULLSHIT! You don't even know my situation bitches! sheesh. So whatever it is. Let me just bear what i have to go through alone and criticism. Nobody knows what has been happening to me right now.

'i just need accompanian from someone special and to love. To have the happy moments that I never went through before! Just someone.. '

2008-03-18T14:01:00.002+08:00

[ i treasure them the most cause without them i'm wont be here]

[they dance and i influence with groove]

[secrets to be kept within us & i treat you as a guardian]

[we did the best we could and we showed what's best in us]

[long ever BESTFRIEND]

[you are the puppet that i need and put me with a smile]

p.s: with all this, i just want to say i love you guys. smooch!

2008-02-15T09:58:00.004+08:00

I will start with the things that change my life recently. I truthly found out who really am I in the past. Criticism, bad mouthing was the best things i could do. In a deep silence, you will hear what a bad Me myself is ! I just couldn't realise and one day you guys make me do it and change ! Since then, it makes me think twice before i happen to reveal secrets. I should be thankful and appreciate from you, it meants me a lot. Because as for me, alone, is hard for me to realise what is to be wrong and what i do is right.

In conclusion, like you say "Think twice before you talk!".

In love for me? Is hard for me to choose and decide what's best for me and what's not ! Don't ever think i'm just like a cheapskate guy who lives down the street. I do have feelings and do cherish them. What makes you think love is easy? Miracle? Hard to say though. You should watched a movie called '27 Dresses'. One of the examples that you will understand what is real love but not lust. Don't you think love is perfection? No, i will judge as that. I do have a long way to go, to search for my love ! So as for now, i do love everybody. And when the time comes, i should be in love one day.

I do have feelings for this lady, but i just knew her. At esplanade, we dance for the first time, and get to know each other. Not really as in chat everyday but at least i get to know her? I hope you know who you are. She did tag me though. haha

Now, i'm busy with dance and stuffs. For dance, im preparing for danceworks with the Fantastic Crew. Just to elaborate more, i have a good bonding with them. i love you guys ! And for other stuffs, it meant to be working and schooling soon.

2008-01-02T19:49:00.000+08:00

Heart-rending moment.

In defination, hertbroken.

-It has to be given away with truth.- -Misspeak is expected.- -What have i done is not enough.- -The nature will take its course.- -The future will soon arrive,later?-

Understand?

What does it really mean?

Explanation has 1000s of answers. You wouldn't know, will it be the truth or false? The only way to figure out is follow yourself what it has to be done next. What will you see in the next step. A door to your explanation? I guess. Be sure what are you up too. Myself, mess up with all kind of things that i don't want them to be exsisted. What will it be happening now to me? My words are all jumble up into one big BLOCK. Will you ever figure out and solve it? Is that what you feel right now? It is what i feel. I feel so MESSY! I think i should just don't give high expects for what i really want, babe. Just do the things you adores.

Happy New Year 2008

and

Happy Birthday to me on the 30th Dec 07!

love and affection comes. =D

2007-12-16T11:24:00.000+08:00

Mental Incapacity.
In defination, unintelligence.

Don't be naive at one point that you are unintelligence. It has stated obviously. All your dumbness and craps it doesn't work on me. Criticising in front of my friends is unneeded. A jerk or a human that is down- syndrome would only do this kind of shit. If stated as a stranger, wouldn't you ignore or in a blind state thats doesn't even care for me. This is just nonsense that childishness will appear in your character. As for the other, thanks for not creating any childishness acts. Because i know this doesn't concern you that much because you are not this picture. In any situation, i still treat you as a friend of mine, Zarifi. Now, you both have him back. So, need no more of me. Hope you guys enjoy your life together. After reading this, if you want to tell others that i'm just playing old same shit or whatsoever, go ahead. Because i'm not. If i am, i wouldn't have blog this and i have criticise you in front of my friends,right? so please, think twice before anything you do. Sorry and apology from me that i have done a lot of mistakes.

:) sweet memories is remembered.

2007-12-10T16:38:00.000+08:00

~NEW~

Face

Personality

Style

Looks

Blogskin

2007-11-29T13:40:00.000+08:00

For people who doesn't know what happen between me and my so called boyfwens sticks, because of judgement of criticism. they put the blame on me, that is fine! but i dont even lie to you before? when isit? you can tell me everything, uh? i swear. i always share my problems with you guys because you are the only guys that i can talk to. you know?but about your own problems, you just share among you both only. not me? why? have i been a stranger long time ago? isn't it? i ask you both about your personal things, you dont even speak. but you guys force me to tell mine. right? don't denied. aku taknak buat gadoh la kan about our friendship, bout love i understand is my fault. but on the other is not my fault. u should know why shahrul! what happen at my house huh? dont ever denied and lie. did i ever ask you about your problems? do i know anything? only partly, but not fully. and when that i know u broke up? from people around. not you guys. on the other hand you cry. did you share with me? no!!! you share with fie and mast! aku ni saper? huh? now you are saying im unfair? how about you guys? cant you see? aku slalu sabar. slalu kene tengking dari korang. kene ikot aper korang cakap. aku ikot. im not your slave. im your friend! but it seems that you dont even appreaciate our moments together. yeah. nahh! is ok. i do treasure them. and fie, remember what i say, you will the best fren that i have ever known. even is only a few months together, sigh. i will keep that in mind, dear. for now. if you still want make the matter bigger, go ahead. but me, i will just listen to critism from my friends around me saying bad. kays? fair for you guys? sigh

2007-11-25T12:26:00.000+08:00

Like i say, it starts over again.

but then, i've moved.

away from dilemma.

now, chasing for love.

and trust is needed.

2007-11-21T13:49:00.000+08:00

Words that are final for you guys.

Now, just leave me alone, what i need to go through now is a new step of my life that will brighten up my future. so, is time for me to leave all the craps with you guys now! not because what i have now, is because what is wrong and what is right for me to do now. don't ever judge me as a person who doesn't exsist his own reputation. i do, you know. so be it! don't denied and lead your own life without me. you can say i'm self-centered or watsoever but i'm not bitch! ok! fine, if you want to hate as much as shit that can be, go ahead. ok? i just want to say good luck with you guys and have a good future ahead.

For you, is not the right time to be having special interest of each other now. i just need to concentrate on what i have to do now for my future and please don't ever forget me or whatsoever. i'm still your friend even you don't even know whats the truth and lies. just want to say, hope you find a person that is more 'better' than me aites? like i say, "alot of guys out there are waiting in the line for you". happy happy days!

You guys, i won't ever forget what i have been through with you guys in the past. it is such a memory for me. really do. now is time for me to move on, right? whatever i say in my blog about you don't ever take it seriously. is just words that my anger make it things worst. uh huh. seriously, you guys are the best people that i want to thank you know. you made my life change for the better? i can't say. but there's a change though. thank you. i appreaciate your own doings. much love from me.

For myself, i have to go thorugh now is what is best for me. i need to. what critism and bullshits i will just take it as a lesson for me or maybe just a bullshit la! haha. so now, is time for me to GROW and be the guy that i really want to be. and my wish has been granted, so the wish has to stay on and live with it. time for me to know that fame is not the only thing i need but is you guys that i need the most. enermies or bestfriends or friends or even strangers, it makes me you a family of mine that does exsist in this world. but the bestfriend that i had for a long time is EYIIN! She is mine, you know. ahha. my bestfriend i mean. so good luck to me and have a journey to become a FANTASTIC FOUR.

-much loves from wawan-

2007-11-20T11:22:00.000+08:00

The best days to start now.

yeahh! i'm now in FANTASTIC FOUR CREW! the best days has to come. uh huh uh huh. i cant believe that i'm in! so now need to work hard for my dance and show people the best that i can do! Congrats to the peopl who made it for the audition, Ashley, Rila, Renni, Amri, Benjy, Syak, Fafa, Zee and Gee, also to Me of course! ahha. So, see you guys on every SundayS at Scape aites?
muachs- lots of love from Wawan

i see in me a better dancer.

2007-11-14T15:31:00.000+08:00

you know sometimes, you should just let go of it. but the thing is, it is stuck with you wherever you go! i care for and love but you tried to fade it but it just doesn't work. what's wrong? do you steal love from me? and you can't let go of it. on the other side, you are pulling back yourself to the past. what for if there isn't much happiness then now with me. is it just a waste of effort knowing me then waiting for the right time with the past? or you just want to move but theres a wall stopping you? i can't even think right now. you are matured enough to think, dearest. you are. don't ever blame the lie to yourself because the starter is me who did it! and please, i do care and love. if not i won't be blogging all this for you. please, you know my only wish. sigh

FOR

Alif Alwee B Abdullah

2007-11-11T13:37:00.000+08:00

I DON'T KNOW WHO TO TRUST TO!

ASH: so mulut tu jage jage sikit. perangai macam budak budak sampai mas semue cakap. budak budak. wanna make alif jealous lah by saying you slept with shahrul. for god sake, alif don't ever have feelings for you before lah. his just going with the flow cause he misses sidek. padan muke. rasekan what am feeling. mael himself knew that it was not during suntec.. and he said so what if it's during suntec... he also don't mind.. and also it's not during suntec... so watch your mouth aight... and one more thing he said you are just 16 so childish... too bad...
MASTURA: perangai macam budak budak. (and tell ash what i have been through. about the lie too! why mas? huh? im so dissapointed. what i have done wrong.)

AYUL: adek tu horny giler. (what is that suppose to mean? you have sex with me before?argh

FIE: why you believe people so easily?????????

SHAHRUL DAYMIE: you deserve it???????

SIDIK: give him a chance. (why shd? u like alf)

ALF: i love you. give me more time. but i still love sidik. wtf! (just go!i mengalah..arghhh)

there's anger in here with me. i'm too kind to you all. i shouldn't have done that?

WHO SHOULD I TRUST??????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i dunno who to turn to now. i just dont know who to trust. why you people are so mean? did i do anything wrong?

fcuk off you people.

2007-11-07T14:41:00.000+08:00

I'M SO GLAD AND HAPPY THAT I HAVE YOU IN MY LIFE. IT IS JUST SO SAD THAT YOU WOULD BELIEVE IT.

love you ablaibfy.

2007-11-06T14:17:00.000+08:00

it hurts when hearing the truth.

it really hurts when hearing the truth, im sorry dear. i have done a bad thing behind your back. im so fucking sorry and i dont know why this could be happening. the main thing is at least i told you. if not you have found it yourself and it will be worst! i've have to be blame. what has happen to me lately? changed? OMG! maybe people always judge me that im good. but unfortunately im not. this is what i am! ive changed. did i?

it is so hard to tell you the truth the next day when we did it. because i was scared that i will lose you b! i do! i do really love you! if your decision has made up that you want to leave me, im ok with it. and thats why i always say to you. 'cherish our times properly.'to spent the wonderful time with you and KAMARSUTRA! and thats why i sacrifice myself to meet you and come to your practices! because one day, i soon need to tell you about this. it will be so painful to hear but at least i have spent time with you this while. i have cherish and treasure it in my heart b! it is so wonderful to have those times every single day. *crying*

I HAVE TO BE BLAME AND EMBARRASS BECAUSE IM NOT A TYPE OF GUY FOR YOU!LET ME ASHAME MYSELF INFRONT OF PEOPLE WHO REALLY JUDGE ME THAT IM A GOOD PERSON!!!

2007-11-05T21:54:00.000+08:00

The storyline of love that i have been through...

Will you ever get jealous when your soulmate's ex is back to love your soulmate again? HE keeps disturbing your partner. even yourself? i wonder... it is just so painful right here, right now! is hard for my partner to understand where is the love from me to him. i just don't really understand why he needs to response whatever his ex ask. i mean you can response but in a 'friend way'. not with the word 'B'! you call me that too. it is just so hurt. and you have two B now? what is this? bullshitting... i just can't take it. i just need to post this to my blog because i want to let it out! because is just waste of time for me to say to you. i love you, b! i really do! but why HIM makes our relationship so complicated and has to go thorugh all his bullshits?? why? why? i'm really hurt, you know? at least you say im grateful to have you! but do i feel that way? you are not in my position. and you know im not your age, dear... i heartz you!=(

Boyfwens...

I really heartz you both FIE and SHAHRUL! i really do. i just want you guys to treat me differently from others and don't ever make me the SAME as ur ex boyfwen kaes? with you guys my life will be a different way. with your laughters and tears, it makes me so glad to have a fwens like you! do cherish our times together kaes? lvoe you guys! and yesterday, went drinking, both of them were drunk badly. haiyo! haha

Myself...

I just want what i really want from people that are special to me. you know? is hard to get it. but to me, i just trust and pray that 'you' will change for the better and make me happy. just forget about the past. keep that as memories but do cherish them and don't ever bring it to us, dear. i hate it! ok? i just want us. not three of us. =( make me the special one now and cherish our times now too... it is just a moment like this...

chocolate is better than vanilla !

2007-10-24T13:48:00.000+08:00

my swEET family:)

DheQarYLL feat. WoNNe'theFREAK

dada & ayeen.sisters

seri & amir. lovely couple

zu & ili. orang2 johor katakekan. lol

mell & aimm.

the anonymous dancer-shaker.

the family of green. i hate green

candid? or nice shot?

aww. we do have cheek bones!

my eyes!too small...

perfect!uncle wawan & andy(abang)

*wardah looks like cik pon *

LOTS OF BEAUTIFUL MEMORIES HAS BEING UPDATED.

2007-10-22T17:34:00.000+08:00

have a LOT of fun since the last post.

i will update the photos soon.

2007-10-12T01:58:00.000+08:00

alot of things have been happening since the last post.

there were some happy moments but some were not. i just can't explain how it turns out to be like this. i'm really sorry for myself. not because of me, bad things won't be happening around me. to mum, im sorry what i have done and i told you since the day i ran away from home, to put me in 'pertapis' but u disapproved it. but why and untill now bad things is happening when i'm around. mum, do you love me? send me to the 'pertapis' if you do. because here, at home, i will always being hurt. why is this happening to me? i think is fated to be like this. don't ever blame your other children but only blame me. ok? *sad* i love you mum, selamat hari raye. maafkan iwan kay? =(

friends, even i have been harsh on you, i'm sorry because is all start from my family. i don't blame them but is just that it get worst when i didn't obey them you see. so please understand if i can't stay the whole night outside with you guys because of them. and now 'im hurt badly on my face and back of my neck'. please believe me guys, ok? friends will always be my family to me no matter what happen kays?

boyfriends, i'm sorry that i shouted at you at titanic kay? i was upset by my parents. because there's alot of things going on with me and my family, especially my father. i hope you understand. hope we still are boyfriends?=(

baby, you are mine now since 9 October 2007. thats when we are offically together. after dating you for 'quite some time', i think is time for us to be together, baby. to me, now, you are really special for me in my heart now. the past that the guys i have dated is over. now, finally i have you. see it through, dear. make an affection. thats what i want it to be. hope you will give it to the fullest. i love you. please do take care of me and guide me to the right path of love. sincerity and loyalty is much appreciated. =)

F.U.N mates, after leaving you guys, i hope between me and you won't ever change. we are still a pham, right? i hope in dance life and friendship you will make it a difference for us. for any help, u can contact me aites. i will be there for you guys. lots of love from me. =)

myself, now i have a new path to go through and with the help of you guys, no obstacles will be hard for me to go through. and also a new pham, KARMASUTRA!

BEING LOVED.=)

2007-10-03T11:35:00.000+08:00

from me;

Layer 1: On the outside
Name: Muhammad Syazwan B Rahmad
Birthdate:30th December 1991
Current Status: Single and Available
Eye colour: Brownish
BlackHair Colour: Black

Layer 2: On the inside
My heritage: Javanese, Malay and Chinese
My fears: Fear of death
My weaknesses: Being bullied and things in a relationship
My perfect pizza: Cheese to be alots! Hawaiian maybe.

Layer 3: Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow
My first thought of waking up: Am i still alive?
My bedtime: Wish to be dream about you
My most missed memories: To be love again

Layer 4: My pick.
Pepsi or coke: Coke
Macdonalds or Burger King: Macdonald
Single or group dates: Single of course!
Adidas or Nike: Nike
Vanilla or Chocolate: VanChoc
Cappucino or Coffee: Coffee

Layer 5: Do you?
Smoke: Yeahh is nice!
Curse: Huh? I don't believe this
Take a shower: What a question to answer
Have a crush: I guess ahha
Go to school: For now no, holidays for me after N'Level
Believe in yourself: Sometimes because i can't predict
Think you're a health freak: No like duh-uh

Layer 6: In the past
Drink alcohol: Yes yes
Gone to the mall: No never been for so long
Dyed your hair: Not yet

Layer 7: Have you ever..?
Played a stripping game: Not ever
Change who you were to fit in: Not ever

Layer 8: Are you hoping to
Get married: Of course because this is life. Get over it!

Layer 9: In a partner
Best eye colour: Blue
Best hair colour: Blonde
Long or short hair: Shoulder length

Layer 10: What were you doing?
A minute ago: Chatting
An hour ago: Reading Newspaper
A Month ago: I lost past my memory
A Year ago: Studying in Rverside Secondary School

Layer 11: Finish the sentences..
I love: You!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I hide: My tears from you
I miss: You so much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I need: Someone to guide my life

Layer 12: Tag 5
1)Daymie
2)Zarifi
3)Fawrah
4)Yenny
5)Eyiin

2007-09-28T15:59:00.000+08:00

EVERYTHING CHANGEs.
Everything change when i say so long F.U.N!. for the past 4mths it will be kept in my heart always. muacks to you all!. for ash, after two weeks at camp, you have change,seriously. i cant believe it. i feel that the feelings is fading away. maybe outside of you you cant feel it but deeply it is, dear. why is it so? i feel so stress and the anger here with me is just keep bursting out.! i dont really understand what it means. even im only 16 it shows that i have alot to know about relationships. sometimes it feels that im just a kid and sometimes i feel that im an adult who doesnt think maturely. so what am i? without a heart, i wont start to love you since 6 September 2007!!! what have been going on in me?? im just confused! shit . this is not me! just my imagination from the side of my conscious. it sucks really do. omg! you dont ever ask me about changes. i just been feeling this way when you are gone i guess so. but still think and go back to the past what had happened since then. sigh~~

A MOMENT LIKE THIS, i guess.

2007-09-25T15:41:00.000+08:00

Ash<3

Every day and night i keep wondering and dreaming about you when you are at camp. im just worried that you will be left alone there and no one will ever take care of you. me, here, not in camp, i feel unsecured without you. im scared people around me will bully me. and you cant even defend me! im just worried and scared of losing you too. but like you say im paranoid. NO im not by! im just loving you so much. i know i have say this for like thousand times, is just to let you remember i will always there for you by! i will.... i really do. i wont let anyone hurt you. not ANYONE! im scared to see you hurt. i will just love you and give what relationship really needs! i love you. muacks love from me to you

2007-09-25T12:09:00.000+08:00

To F2DM: i have so much great times with you. i really do like dancing with you guys. but soon, i will be no more with you guys. one fine day, i guess. we have so much memorable memories together. is just hard to leave you all,one day,but need to. the friendships between you guys will never be forgotten. like i say, BECAUSE OF YOU! =)

To F.U.N: we have gone through so much performances and competitions. alot, really. even we are only 4months! i just can't bear to leave you guys. i really love you all lots!!

Yenny: you are just one of my very best girlfriend that i have! you will always help me whenever i have problems. you adviced me too. thats what i like about you. care for me too much! haha.

Shilla: dear, you are a talented dancer to me. have the passion to be the best dancer. i like when you share with me your problems it feels that im not being left out. i just to love to talk to you!hee

Mastura: you are the girl who i pull you in here!heh. to me and to all of the best dancers, we commented on you that you are the best dancer too and we like your energy level, though. mast, i just love to hang out with you. because it makes me smile. even abang hawtt ader kann??lolx. i wanna see you go far mast. far than i ever expected.

Haiqal: qal, you have the potential to dance and even to break. but for now, experience dancing with F.U.N because from dance thats how you can improve on your breaks. thats what i ask from a friend of my. she is a breaker and a dancer. yeahh. i really like to dance with you because kite jiwe lelaki kat F.U.N.! lolx.

* so i just want to say that go F.U.N!!!you rawks!! im leaving soon , i guess. =( *

~*~MUACKS~*~

2007-09-19T14:03:00.000+08:00

i miss my hubby so much!!!

i misses you so much. till i listen to 'lilitan asmara' and cried in front of the comp. i wish i have you to be with me in camp. but then, is not going to happen. every nite before you went to sleep i will always give you a voicemail. and you could hear my voice, but not me. is ok. i understand. your batt is low. haish. im so loving you and missing you so much. the time we have been together all this while. omg! im crying by!. dont ever hurt me or say when i stop loving you and i can search another partner.NO!!!!!!!!!ok?muacks!!!!! love you by...=(

meet up with you when you book out and i will spent time at ur house for three days aites?=)

2007-09-10T15:05:00.000+08:00

I CHANGED BLOGSKIN.

yeahh.

comment on it!!!

to my one month anniversary:

hubby, i have a wonderful time with you on 6 September 2007. we watched no reservation and we ate at Pastamania. but then, im sorry i didn't buy for you, what you really want. im really sorry, dear. i feel guilty. and i promised you that our two month we be a splendid and wonderful with surprises that will be coming towards you. and i want to wish you happy NS in tekong. i hope you will enjoy and take care of yourself. and also im going to MISS YOU SO MUCH!!!! *cry* muacks with love.

and to those who taking N's or O'S Level, be prepared and good luck for all your papers. * wish for what you really want!!!*

2007-09-02T20:51:00.000+08:00

a boring day for me .

i had a performance with F.U.N collaborating with D'max && B2B at the place where F.U.N had a performance last time near the woodlands primary school. till 1030am. is like so effing early sia. then we went for breakfast at 888plaza. then Faizal introduce us a game called 'polar bear'. we sitted around the void deck && once get scolded by some of the residents there. Mas was freaked out because it was like just a sudden. lol. "kental buah ke mas". dah part aku boring kan. hmph! lol. after that, we went back home safely and i went to eat, sleep && atudy for my exam tomorrow! ouch. im scared. =!

random: i love you BY! && try to spend more time with me before you go. "im scared". =(

2007-08-31T11:55:00.000+08:00

TEACHER'S DAY!

im so touch by the performances today. && i did perform. my form teachers cried. im so touch by you all who supported me during the performance. i love you all.

To BY!
i love you dear. i dont hav much to say cos all the words is been kept in here with me. like i say, think positively aites. i hope we will spent times together more before you go in. =( *cry* sayang you && gonna miss you alots!!!

NLEVEL IS THIS COMING MONDAY! AH.

.backtoaction.

2007-08-31T11:54:00.000+08:00

hey!

sorry for not updating.

busy all this while.

yeahh

2007-08-13T13:48:00.000+08:00

i TON for three times last week.

OMG!

not enough sleep and prelim is starting today.

argh!

need to do well.yeahh

'love to ashes, burn through paper.'

-find what it means-

woo.

2007-08-11T14:07:00.000+08:00

. Freedom UrbaNites .

/. happy THREE months to YOU .\

\. LOVE<3>

random*

what i have made the decision better accept the fact. this is what i want and need. no one can change it. accept what i am. dont ever deny it.

yeahh.

MY LIFE CHANGES.

2007-07-30T21:07:00.000+08:00

loneliness.

tought that you dont ever care about me. but then, after i asked you about us, you answered that 'if can i dont want to lose you'. aww. so sweet of you, dear. i feel glad and good to hear about that. but still, im worried about you. you have been sick for the past one week. and at least we talk things out that why are we seldom talk on the phone and meet. hmm. yeahh! i love you, dear and missing you so much! MUACKS* =)

*objective*

get in to the finals for Teacher's Day Concert.

do a job well done for 5August07 National Day Celebration.

concentrate on my studies after 5August07.

do well in my prelims and N-level.

2007-07-29T21:03:00.000+08:00

*random*

WHAT'S WITH YOU?

i dont feel the same way.

i want you YOU the last time.

why is it so hard to understand.

is just the matter of you want or not.

but then, i love you!

-BIATCHES-

to those who talks about god, just leave my blog and dont ever comment on it. you dont deserve to be here. because you yourself dont understand it meant. and you dont ever realised that you are not that perfect. dont ever comment on other people. please.

pics that are suppose to be post.

BEAUTIFUL us .

2007-07-23T21:23:00.000+08:00

there are so much problem that has not been solve.

need to find a way for it.

just need someone & that is you.

who can help me to lead my life.

just you can ever do for me.

& never say without words.

because is hard for me to say,

i love youu!

colours really makes me smile.

2007-07-18T20:46:00.000+08:00

i love youu , hubby bunny!

youu, please dont hate me or because im so in love with youu. && dont start to be confuse just because of a small matter. it will affect us, dear. just dont ever care about what are they thinking, ok? =( *muacks*

&& as for the rest that always accusing me attached with this kind of person, please stop or what! think twice! or you can just ask me straight, right? && i will tell you the truth. sheesh. please stop it! hmph.

&& thanks angelboy for your advices && everything. i need it so much. wee. it is worth talking to you. waw! heh=) && yar. i have the same experience as you, what you have been through. thanks.

i love youu <33

*MY HUBBY BUNNY*

=)(=

-you are the one i need this while-

-dont ever leave me, dear!-

bluekk!

2007-07-17T18:39:00.000+08:00

i have so much problems in me now.

whats going on today, man! haish. i fought with my parents again. i just dont understand what they want from me actually. && even my dad hit with his bare hands. && even i went to the kitchen && took a KNIFE && say i wanna die! but then, mum stop me. but why? tought you will be happy to see me DIE, right mum?? =) i will just feel the pain inside && i will never ever let it out to show you what is the pain is all about. i know. im cruel. ANAK DERHAKA!

let me be this way mum. && let me go by my way alone. without you nagging me along the way. i will have peace without anyone. just me, alone. && i dont have anyone to turn to. && even dad say wanna put me at boy's home, right? this friday? go on, mum. i have nothing for you already. you can just put me there. && DONT EVER TREAT ME AS YOUR SON AGAIN!!=(

YOU ARE SO MEANT, BOTH OF YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

&& AS FOR SOMEONE THAT YOU SHOULD KNOW WHO AM I WRITING TO.

please dont ever critisize me again. if you would, you know what will happen to you. && dont ever think you will always WIN! yeahh!! shitt. && what people say about you is true. you just dont understand love. everytime you are the one who keep changing love. what is this? monkey love all the way? && even don say is true!!!! what you have been doin is not rite. please. concentrate on your studies. && please i never hate you before. you can ask the rest of the F.U.N. please. you didnt realise you have a person like me that always care for you. even you wil like M.I.A for like 4days. i keep contacting you. but you dont ever care. haish. what to do. you dont love me. is fine with me. i understand. && the next meeting, dont ever try to go step over my head. you know what will happen. that is what my bro-in- law && my sis says. && they can even find for you. && remember, i know where you stay. && dont ever say to people i take revenge. please! that is so childish. revenge is for people who doesnt know what is true love. && love is not all about SEX!! haha. ok. i wont say anymore. cos it makes me laugh so much. ok -ended-.

dont ever do anything to let me hurt or whatesoever. you will have it back if you do it. fair && square.

-peace-

as for my hubby bunny!

thanks for being there for me! i didnt even tought you will be the one. we have known each other for a long time, && now we just knew that we love each other right? heh. i love you, dear. to the fullest. bluekk!! muacks* sayang you bangat bangat. =)

random pics;

so cheeky of us; you! what face is that?? haha

2007-07-13T13:45:00.000+08:00

heyy. i'm back to basics

=)

anyone wanna know something? is that love cant change easily. && really, is hard to figure out what they want or what they need. holyshitt! && i need a person that can be my activity partner for the time being. to advice me everything what am i doing. to go to the right path instead of the wrong path. so, please tagg me people to give advices, ok? yeahh

domies && darlings, remember that we will not be apart of anything happen! love you darlings.

i wanna wish HAPPY TWO MONTHS to F.U.N! wee

2007-07-10T20:34:00.000+08:00

I KNEW ALL ALONG!

YOU PEMBASTARD!

i shouldnt have stay just like that not to disturb you because tought you are really busy for your Olevel. fcuk me! i was wrong. && now you ask me to go to my 'stalker'? WHAT IS THIS FUCKING SHITT. && i say if i take the stalker where should i put you? you said, DUNNO? what is that shit answer, again? you are just the same old you. never been change. i knew all along since the hip hop hurray gig. you didnt even talk to me regularly since then. arghh. fine with me. when you read this, we are offically BREAK! you heard that? hmm. lets just be friends. i think the second chance is not even worth it for us. && thanks for everything. i appreciate it. c you around some other times. =)

&& as for you. welcome to my life! wee

2007-07-09T17:44:00.000+08:00

i have nothing to post actually because im not in the mood yaw.
so, let me say this.
LET ME TASTE IT FIRST, you bitch!
*random && no comments for it.*

i dont feel it && i failed it. ffuck sial!

2007-07-04T14:04:00.000+08:00

- MY DEATH IS NOT DONE YET -

look at the bright side. a lot of things is HAPPENING!!! =)

&& wawan, you should know yourself better. dont let yourself down just for a small matter or maybe love? there is always a solution to it. this is your life. you live for it! dont give for anything. be yourself. dont let people change you. because this is YOU! you have your life. dont ever let people take over you to be control. you have a long term to live till your death. so be it, wawan! please listen to your heart. they will always make things right for you.=)

YOU: is hard for people to understand what you want && what you need. for me, i just need love && affection. that is what come to me first. if you cant accept what am i, just be it. i wont force you to accept what i am. this is me. i wont ever let people change me, dear. i have a life to live till my death. even my words && actions is not enough for what you need from me, i cant do anything. but love is something that i can give it to you, b! i love you. i love you. I LOVE YOU!!

*something will change us to go further && prove them wrong that we can lastlong enough for them to be convince.*

2007-07-01T11:56:00.000+08:00

to make the story short during friday-saturday(29jun-30jun), we went to esplanade to see my friends performing. then, we went to shilla's house to overnight with him, yenny, shilla && faris. we have alot of fun watching horror stories. of course, im not scared of this scary movies. lol. then, we woke up at 10am. then, i saw yenny took a pic of me n him sleeping. candid keper?haha. so, then he leaves to attend a meeting. so, i, yenny && shilla talk craps && we laughed && dance!(sempat joget ehk). so we watched a movie that was so disgusted. yucks! so, then we 'siap-ing' && went to Macdonalds to have our early dinner, i guess before R && A eat our foods. so, then we went to esplanade straight to meet the rest of the peeps. while we got there, i was been shock alot of times cause of the "BOOM" of the NDP. wth. *so the memeranjat kann*. so yeahh! then, the show start of the youth day concert. so, went to watch. about 9pm. him && syakira came. so we watched the concert together. is was really DOPE! seriously sia. && then, about 10plus we went home safely. -the end- =)

2007-06-28T22:21:00.000+08:00

today at school:
IT WAS FUNN!yeahh. smoked in class. ops! eat in class. ops me again! && i paid attention at my science teacher. wee. so, then my date for my N-LEVEL ENG ORAL. is on 9 july. two weeks time. wtf! so fast!shhesh. need to practice my conversation. because it really SUCKS on me. ok then, have music for the lesson. i have a presentation to sing in front of my class. && everyone was amazed with my voice. lol.(macam paham but is true). then, need to practice our singing && my music teacher praise the boys that we have a great voice. thanks for the compliment, i guess.

after school:
then, went to have self-study near EYIIN's block. usual place. went there wait for her to come down but is like too late because i need to go for my cca. omg! so very the long time didnt go for my cca. haha. so went for practice && finished around 6pm. i was tired then. then, went lepak-ing with my sis(syilae) && bro(asyraf) near my house. was funny && hilarious talking about...erm, got lar! is confidential. lol. so went back home then because i was too tired && HUNGRY! =)

at home:
help my mum with chores && eat && call him for awhile to see that is he home yet. so, he is! then, went online at 10pm. to blog && i called him again. so we were like keeping quiet most of the time, i guess. because 'tak ader topic nak cakap.' sigh~~

so, make me the only one can love you! ilu=)

2007-06-27T23:05:00.000+08:00

school time:
it was a great day because i end early today.1230pm!!woohoo. only four lessons. yeahh! so then, for the last period it was fcuk up! i was being scolded by my science teacher. he says i was a good performer && dancer in school. well- known, all teachers always praise me && blah blah blah shit! but is true, though. haha. then i make a sarcastic && plastic face behind him. lol. so, my friends laughed out loud. like the class is their own bedroom lar! so yeahh. it was so funny during the science lesson. was filled with jokes && laughters. the whole class didnt paying attention to him. hehe. yeahh. ops!

then, otw to airport:
i lepak-ing with my malay friends && smoked with them yar. then, need to meet my ex(miza) to hand her a shirt that she bought from me. hmm. is $15 dollars worth it for a POLO T?? i guess not. so, nvm lar. yeahh. then, meet my hubby at tampines && bought oreo choc with a pearl. then, smoked together. && then, rushed to the bus because the bus alomost went off. so we made it.

reached the airport:
i was excited && shocked to see the airport was like so nice && have nice view. && took the skytrain for like three times?? ouh. long story. haha. then, went to BK to study with hubby && hubby's classmates. so yeahh! it was like my first time studying there. it was cool. the environment is so peaceful even i can hear the silence. lol! so, study study && study. then, i have my dinner with my hubby && aisyah(dont how to spell her name, really). jokes around while eating. then, went back study for awhile.

back to home:
then, i && hubby went back home. err, actually not. we went to tampines to "lepak" for awhile. haha(evil laugh). we smoked && sang out loud all the out-dated songs. like UNFAITHFUL, WE BELONG TOGETHER && etc. then, took the train. while we sitting inside the train. i saw this picture. it was a plastic bag. && it was a BREAD TALK plastic bag. there is a picture with complicated stuff in it. i dont know to explain. so yar. we play a game. if we figure out right what me or hubby ask us to look for in the complicated picture, we will treat each other lar. so,

HUBBY OWE ME STARBUCKS && TEN STICKS!!!YEAHH
=)

2007-06-26T22:24:00.000+08:00

today was a GREAT day, i guess??

start with school:
ouhyar. i didnt go to school just because of stomache.lol. yeahh! it was so painful && i shit. duhh, of course.

went for practice at changat changi sec:
yeahh. went there to teach the students hip hop dance for their camp. my friends need a helping hand so i went to help them. *winks* .the students were so funny && they really enjoy dancing what i have tought them. they are fast learner, though. they were great! really. but, i feel something missing. that will be him, of course. he didnt turn up for the practice. i was upset && worried, then. because i msg && kol him alot of times, he didnt even reply or watever. i was mad at times. but is ok. i think positively. maybe, he has a night class, i guess. so i went back home.

otw to home:
an send me to the bustop near tampines regional library. so waited for it && we chat while waiting. yeahh! when the bus arrived, i get into the bus && look for a seat. it was double decker, of course. then while i was reading a book called "A QUICK BITE", i heard a ringtone. a tone that was so familiar. the song was a dance from D.U.A. for siglap performance. only cheryl put that ringtone as her msgtone. so i turned to the left. then i saw cheryl. i say 'HI!'. i was right! lol. yeahh. so we chatted at the bus. but mostly we were doing our own things. it has been a long time since we talk sehh. so went we reached woodlands, we go separate ways. she was going to her boyfie's house. && me, went home of course. yeahh

at home:
i changed my clothes. && wash up. then, i call his house. his sis picked up. i said, "is HE in?". then his sis said, "yeahh! just hold on. ABANG!!!". i was relieved that he was at home safely. then i asked. "where did you go just now? you didnt reply my msgs or even kol me?" then he replied."i had a night class." so yeahh. then i said. "ouh,ok. so what are you doing?". "watching the 'ANUGERAH SHOW'."he said. well, his favourite,though. so yeahh. he dont want to be disturb. he said he will kol me later. so i went for dinner. because i didnt eat just now after the practice. so i online, then. && i went to post about today's story.

SO HERE I AM POSTING SOMETHING ABOUT TODAY!
=)

2007-06-25T22:12:00.000+08:00

last weekend;

went to ECP with YOU &&anna &&shilla &&Faris &&etc.(macam panjang nak tulis,lol!)

i was having a great time till i forgot something for my fren that they ask me to bought something. the thing was with mast. ohh shit! she was at city hall then. so, the sake of my fren i needed to go to city hall &&took it &&went back to ECP. OMG!i was exhausted then. but nevermind, cos my hubby make me cool down and and get ready the food for me to eat!aww so sweet of you,darling. then, i saw hakim(F4). waw!so not the expecting him to come. but then, someone told me the rest oF f4 WILL BE COMING!so yar. i was excited.

few hours later, hakim says that ewan n gino(i guess) cant make to the pit.i was so like...erghh!but i say to myself.hmm is ok for me cos my hubby is still with me.he can make the night 'more glory', i say!lol

so yar, 6plus we went back to shilla's house to wash up &&get ready for performance..so the ferst time to dance with him!yeahhh. he was so nervous!mesti larr da lamer tak dance. && i was so excited larr cos my ex gal was coming.but in the end,she didnt make it.cos she was with her family &&they need to go somewhere else.nvm then. so after the performance, i said"it SUCKS!". i was lack of energy n some stuffs. i think is all cause of the pit thingy. hmm.but nvm at least we put up something than nothing, right??

so, went to wheelock. but then hubby keep saying wanna go home?wanna go home?i was so irritated &&angry cos if he wana go home just go home larr.hmph! so before reaching orchard i went down at newton.i just say bye to all &&dashed out of the mrt. thenn, i felt at fault. cos i know he will get angry at me cos i went out just like dat &&i didnt even say a proper bye to him.(die memang kuat merajok.hehe). so, i wanna say sorri dear.a BIG sorri!!!muackies.i never meant to do that, bb!realli??!!hmm. sorri once again, dear.

*random*: i feel missing when you are not around me.=(

so; i took a picture of myself. for you to remember me.

2007-06-23T09:17:00.000+08:00

start with my bestie!*random*

Eyiin! always remember that i will always be there for you. we have known each other for 4 YEARS! it will be waste if we be enermies. so im just saying it not to be a reality for us. &&we will do our best for our major exams, ok? after graduate we will go to different schools. so, dont ever lost contact with me. when you are my bestfren, always a bestfren, k gal? love you, gal!

:the first day of practice with my hubby:

bb always make a fool of himself cos he doesnt concentrate on his steps. &&seriously bb, u are so cute when you wear that cap that kemetot bought for you, dear! with the fringe at the front. &&please dear, dont be late next time kaes? cos it will affect our future. e.g. like our 1month &&you are late for our dinner or something.=) muackies! sayang you sangat sangat.

people look at the pics and tag me which pic does look very cute!~aites

cutess me;=)

2007-06-22T02:08:00.000+08:00

i really have fun with the OBORs yesterday!hope to meet you again soon yawll!

wee=)

randomly;

i am MISSING her alots!
=(
my god sister as always, i say?!
heh

&&you know what?i have an upcoming performance this sunday(24june07).
for further details guys, just tag me here aite.
thanks for supporting my fans &&supporters!
wee

2007-06-19T20:34:00.000+08:00

While i'm staring at you, you comed to me and say,"Is the time to be with you."
you are the one all along.=)
"i love you,dear!"

something is loved. thats us to be together now.waw
&&the sentosa time,during the weekend, was a great night!
shh.hehekz.bluekk!!

2007-06-12T15:08:00.000+08:00

The picture made us to perform at SQUARE 2 -NOVENA.
it was a wonderful one.
full of energy &&enthusiasm.
a dance that was too powerful that still the stage was small.
=)
well done gals &&thanks to our supporters.
always been there for us.
wee

then,
i &&my malay classmates went to SENTOSA to have a picnic together.
is was fun but i didn't swim.
was too tired &&sick. fagg
but then we wnt to sky tower &&THE MERLION.
is was so adventurous of us && we camwhores alot.haha
didn't upload here. lazy bumm me.
=)

so,
just being myself again.
wait for what to come towards me.
=)

2007-06-07T12:00:00.000+08:00

being supersticious is not a kind to be an ATTENTION SEEKER!

but you have prove me wrong that i'm not.

but still you don't accept the fact.

uh?

fagg.

but then,

it will turn out to be a good compliment.

&&i'm in love with you!

hope what i confessed to you, you won't hate me forever!

i know i'm just a kid.

but doesn't mean i don't know nothing about love.

i will prove you wrong, dear.

sigh.

2007-06-05T16:20:00.000+08:00

without you all i will be the nobody in this world.=)

&&you!

i love you.

i want to confess to you that ilu.

but im scared what happen last time.

im scared to happen again.

i will have a breakdown situation. fagg

please understand me &&love me to love you??

2007-05-28T21:33:00.000+08:00

during the weekends, was so hawtt!!!

with FANTASTIC FOUR!

waw && ends with a FULLSTOP

-done-

next,

RUTH

i just want to say sorry what i have done &&i realised what is wrong about me. i've learnt my lesson, really. thanks to SHAHRUL MUHAIMIN!huhu :x

2007-05-25T12:21:00.000+08:00

"mum, you always make me cry!"

what do you really want from me actually?!huh? i know you really care for me, but not too OVER!!! I'm not a servant of yours, but why you make me one of them? && why must you not trust me && always I need to say "I SWEAR...!". you still don't trust my words isit? I'm your son, mum! your first son! hmph. fine. is up to you to make decision. i know I'm not like your other sons. they are like so good to you. &&i'm not. fine with me!=(

and you,

i'm still waiting for you, but you don't ever care about it! i know you are waiting for someone that you have known for a long time, but is time for you to move on. not that i want to control you. is just that i want to advice you before your mindset get worst! hmm...

"D",

why must you tell the one i love about us? i already say what happened on the other day. FORGET ABOUT IT! but you insist to tell the others about it. whats this? revenge? && i'm ashamed now. all are hating me. even my girlfriends, you know that! argh. i'm so mad at you.

RUTH,

you still regards me as your enemy? fine with me. is your decision to make. i really treasure you lots. cos your the first ex that change my life for the better. but in another way, you have make me embarassed in front of my friends. i think is a lesson for me. but then, you are just a child that was just been born. oh, please. you bitch! argh.

isit just me or an embarrassment of myself?=(

2007-05-22T16:53:00.000+08:00

I am just saying to peace out, you bitch!

for RUTH

:))

still not happy with me, isit?

fuck you off, bitch!

then, the stories begin here...

we all came back from performances from F.U.N.it was damn cool. &&now i'm in F.U.N.

&&this coming Sunday(27 may 07)

we will be perfoming for FANTASTIC 4 for their party!waw.
&&people want to come ask me aites. for details if you can be invited.:))

2007-05-20T22:36:00.000+08:00

i'm so like the new me. i am lar bitch!:))
so vogue. waw:X

2007-05-20T22:06:00.000+08:00

what hurts the most?

love?friendship?revenge?
OR WHAT!

"what a stupid jerk that always make a fool of himself. people say you are despo &&immatured ." you don't have the guts to say it out in front of me isit?&&again who likes you! you are just not the bitch that i'm interested to know. yeah, you bitch!&&please lah nobody is perfect in this world. you think you are like so f***ing perfect uh?*puking*.sheesh. &&also you want to bring your gang down isit? go ahead. you think i don't have uh? please lar. grow up lar. fighting about this is like so immatured. you must know that to be a gay is not right. &&still you want to create trouble. *sigh*. up to you what to do to me. anything goes wrong i SWEAR WITH MY WHOLEHEART THAT YOU WILL KNEEL DOWN ON ME AND BEGGING FOR FORGIVENESS. yay! stop it sial. you no need to say to me that to take care of myself because you are the one must take care of yourself because alot of people hate your attitude. you know that, boy?!
hmph

this is for SHAHRUL a.k.a RUTH--->he sucks:))

2007-05-17T10:17:00.000+08:00

the days with my girlfriends &&the breakers.

(can't remeber the dates.)

we went to esplanade. to like have F.U.N day out.huhu:x

practice like almost everyday. because of an important upcoming performances.yeah

then still when with them, we even camWHORES and making scenes during our practices like so nonsensical of us. hahah

&&for your info;i'm joining CHEERLEADING-SPHYNTRIX(not yet confirm)

but still can see the people i want to see. ops!

9 May 07

Me,Eyin &&carmela went to library to study. because we were like bored at home. nothing to do. but then, when we reached the library. we saw two men in a different scene were acting weird. are they crazy? or mentally? huhu. so then i was disturbed. hmph. but me &&my girls were laughing &&laughing. can't stand it. this guy make a bird sound in the library.is like so weird.lol. then we chill at second level at BPP where we can smoke. so then we went home safely.:))

2007-05-17T10:10:00.001+08:00

yeah.
at last my account have repaired.huhu:))
going to update alot about the past.woohoo.

WoNNe'theFREAK's out .

2007-05-07T11:09:00.000+08:00

"start with a 'hello'. ends with a 'bye' ".

is it me?or my other self that makes me crazy.is just difficult to make a decision when there is two option in your mind. now, confusion is all around me. hmph! the one i need is being controlly-love with someone. but the someone doesn't love him. can't the one understand? choose the person who love you. because it can make your life more happier and your feelings for him/her can be change. is hard for me to say this but i'm in love with DAYMIE! even DAYMIE can say that DAYMIE hate me, i will still have feelings for that person. and love for him. love can't change that easily. and RUTH, i'm matured enough to have a relationship now. and not desperate like YOU!haha. and i can prove you wrong. but how? hmms. i will think a way n make the relationship longlast, what i have waited and needed for a long time. but will he be mine one day?uh...

2007-05-06T14:35:00.000+08:00

<3 me ; went to ESPLANADE .heh:)

2007-05-04T10:25:00.000+08:00

a reflection of me doesn't mean i'm not there for you. it says"not suppose to stay in the dark". but i am now. cause ive been hurt. but life need to experience alot of things, it can be bad or good. the only thing you can do is face the truth and wait for the next turn to get what you need and want for. love is what i need next. but it turns to be a hurtful love. to make this clear. im in love with "D". but "D" doesnt really feel the love and affection. the next step is to wait. true love will come by itself. &&is just me n you;hide it; behind the dark that you can't see the real me.

2007-05-03T13:23:00.000+08:00

me &&myself; heh:)

2007-05-03T12:35:00.000+08:00

starts here...

memories...

i will be missing the past that we have been through together. is just so suweet to be with you all. we have been through alot of things that were unexpected but we made it through. even if we have separated, you all still will be here with me. remember you!love you all!*hugs &&kisses*

2007-05-03T12:30:00.000+08:00

i just feel not to show my face to you. i feel bad when someone love you first then me. are you blaming me to love you? is just a feeling makes me feel wanderous. feel the same thing as you. i will treasure the time n love you will be giving me from the start of us. &&promised him that to take care of you. in any matters of help. loves you b!muackies~*:)

everlasting love

2007-04-18T01:17:00.000+08:00

hey.
people;sowie so long no updates.
i noe i have been changing girls around.
haiyo

love;love;love
wat is so good bout it?
is just a period of time.
i noe my blog is not bout love.
is bout myself.
is just dat i just want to express myself.
:)

people just dun understand my situation.
is complicated.

just waiting for the RIGHT person;heh:)

-peace out-
wawan

love can wait;i think

2007-04-09T00:49:00.000+08:00

hey;sorry for a long NOT updating the blog.
haish
love?
what is that?
haish

is so painful rite now.
a person that i really love stil love anothr person.
hmms.
y cant THAT person just tell me str8?
isit so hard?
my heart wun break if YOU tell me earlier.
i saw YOUR lover's profile at frenster.
testii for him?love?
hmms
so into him.
haish
not that i wanna stop you.
i just dun understand WHY you didnt tell me earlier.
haish
so that i can move on.n say that YOU are not into me.
ARGH.
im so fucked up!
haiyo

HEY!IM JUST SO BEING FREAKY I KNOW!

peace;not yet-

-sadwawan-

I NEED YOU

2007-04-01T12:59:00.000+08:00

NAZ;I REALLY NEED YOU;
PLEASE COME TO ME;PLEASE
I LOVE YOU
I REALLY DO;
I JUST WANNA B WIT YOU
ONLY YOU;
TILL NOW I DIDNT GVE UP HOPE FOR YOU
M I NT THE RITE ONE!?
HAISH
NAZ I REALLY LOVE YOU;
EVEN YOU HAVE HURT ME OR WATSOEVER;
PLEASE NAZ;OVE ME BACK
&&TAKE ME BACK
HOPE AFTER YOU READ THIS WILL CHANGED YOUR MIND;
I JUST WANNA B WITH YOU.
:(

-peace out-
Wawan

breakdown;hardly

2007-03-21T16:01:00.000+08:00

THEday dat ive cried n sick alot;haish

people keep cumin to me && say I HATE YOU;wawan
fine;im nt that perfect
but why?
even i have lose my loves one;esp naz

dear;
i just want you back;badly
i wana comfort YOU how theLORVES one comfort you;
lets fate do its thing;haiyo

&&daymie;
SO WHAT IF I BITE UR STEPS!?
IS JUST STEPS;HAIYO

&&chuck;ruth;jojo;naz;
to all of this misunderstanding;is just bcos of me;
playing ppl hearts;
but now;
really;I LOVE NAZ SO MUCH
i just need someone to help me through to get naz back;ah!
haish

please anyone?

-unpleasant out-
Wawan

succeed;But sick of it

2007-03-17T15:31:00.000+08:00

hey .
yaw!wassup people;heh:)

updating again;duhh

on 10 march;
was a succeed;i guess
haha
i have good feedbacks from my frens;yeahh
but unpleasant feedback from DAYMIE;sheesh
haiyo

now;
upcoming performance &&comps;
one performance;31 march
one comp;21 april
SO FAST!!!

&&in D.U.A;
im the IT PERSONNEL;haha
yeahh
thats me;updating at friendster &&msn.

heh:)

&&my family &&i are goin well;
even with my D.U.A peeps;huhu

-peace out-
Wawan

YEAHH;PERFORMANCE

2007-03-09T13:15:00.000+08:00

HEY.
long time didnt update;yar?
too bz with problems &&skool &&werk;haiyo
TOO many things.

&&tomorrow;
ther wil b a performance at ANG MO KIO
730PM-9PM
i will be dancing;duhh
my passion mah.
haha
bring ur frens;aite?!!
heh:)

-peace out-
Wawan

WATEVER

2007-02-27T20:28:00.000+08:00

HEY;WHAT IS ALL THIS
IS FUCKING CRAPS;DUHH

LIKE IT OR NOT;IT SUCKS .
TALKING BOUT ME &&WATSOEVER .
ARGH

YOU HAVE RUINED MY LIFE;&&NOW
WENT TO THAT 'PERSON'.
WHAT IS ALL THIS.
ARE YOU TESTING ME.
OR JUST PLAYING AROUND.
YOU DON'T GIVE A FUCK MAN(KEWAT)
SHEESH

LOSER ISIT;HAISH

WHAT AM I TOKIN BOUT;HAIYO
STRESS UP;REALLY.
ARGH
SHEESH
BULLSHIT.

&&AYIS &&JOJO &&FADIL
;SOWIE TO HURT &&MAKE UR RELATIONSHIP WITH CHUCKID;OPS
REALLY
IM AT FAULT;REALLY
I MUST NOT DENIED IT;YEAHH
HMM
OK?
PLEASE;FORGIVE HIM
N IF YOU TINK IM AT THE RONG SIDE;HOPE YOU CAN FORGET BOUT ME
AS A FREN OF YOURS;HAISH

IM TOKIN CRAPS AGAIN;SHEESH
SO SUCK UP MAN;OUCH

WHAT HS HAPPEN TO ME?
IM REALLY BREAKDOWN NOW
SOMEONE;JUST SOMEONE
PLEASE APPEAR INFRONT OF ME;
N HELPPPP ME!!!!

PISSED OFF;FUCK YOU

-WAR-
WAWAN

after one&&then another;haish

2007-02-21T14:11:00.000+08:00

hey .
teenage life is NOT easy to handle;
like miza says .heh:)
but throughout it;experience alot of things .
the problems YOU face is just like;
you draw SOMETHING on a paper;but when you did wrong;
you THREW it away .
haish
is so CRUEL;really

why must people make problem to ME only!?
why people must put a BLAME on someone cos of me!?
m i at fault?
or i have done wrong .
recently when i broke up with HER;world have change .
phew
&&people just don understand that .WHAT!

recently;
all my posts is all in a unhappiness way;duhh
shitman -.
maybe is just a 'ONCE UPON A TIME' story .
not for long?i guess .
ops;-touch wood-
haiyo .

p.s:please come back to me again;i need YOU .:(

-peace out-
Wawan

im heartBROKEN;:(

2007-02-20T12:55:00.000+08:00

hey .
to tell YOU people;ive been HEARTBROKEN since a gerl told me that im a GAY;
btw im NOT;fuck off
YOU all people dont understand;wat if YOU were in my shoes!?

SHE left me;so soon
haish
&& i fought with my parents;dad punch me
ouch
summore!?
what will going to be happening to ME!?
argh

i just want to be with HER back;please
sumone help me to 'PUJOK' her;haish

sadness.......:(

-peace out-
Wawan

so DAMN not the day

2007-02-19T16:10:00.000+08:00

today is NOT myday;fuck

just bear with it;cos life still need to goes on;haishh
is a upside down world now;what?
people who loves me;
turn
people hate me now;wtf
is it a DREAM?
im at FAULT?!
really?
too many problems in mind;
cant get any solution for any of my problems.haiyo

let GOD do its thingy;just wait
it will gon to be bad or good?
not sure;only HE knows
hope to be good;

i want everyone to know dat im nt tat perfect;:(
just a normal person wit ALOT of problems;duhh
people please understand the situation;
CAN?

-peace out-
Wawan

VALENTINE;you

2007-02-12T16:59:00.000+08:00

VALENTINE'S DAY is coming;yeahh
&& i got ONE;
hehe

first;
i GOT alot of things to settle;
e.g.;
family
friends
dance(4 kinds)
nlevel
work
freako.trinity
&& alotmore.

second;
now.nobody is in my life except for R__H
yeahh:))
she is ONE of a kind;bluek
HAHA

third;
getting prepare for my major examinations;ouch
so THE nervous;haish

fourth;
R__H will always be in my HEART;muahs
she is the ONE of a kind;haha
she is different from others YOU KNOW?bluek
i just LOVE her;really do.
please;don't leave medear.

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU PEOPLE OUT THERE;yeahh

-peace out-
Wawan

hey;happy enjoyment

2007-02-09T23:18:00.000+08:00

hey .
people;YOU KNOW WHAT?
i went out to esplanade with THEM;coolness

i went out with THEM to hang out;yar
it was so DAMN fun;lol
we laugh;jokes around
&& we have 'mengupat' about everibody;ops
HAHA

really DAMN fun;yeahh
&& i met a friend dat i admire last time;she was so hot
hehe
BUT *toot* still in my mind;yipee .

so;
now im tired;haish
tomorrow got TWO dance;
ONE;anniversary
TWO;performance n comp;outside

haiyo;so THE tiring

&& people i nid strong dancers;tag me if interested .

-peace out-
Wawan

ive been hurt;ouch

2007-02-05T22:11:00.000+08:00

HEY!

WHAT HAPPEN TO YOU NOW?!
HAVE YOU CHANGED OR WHAT?!
IM SERIOUS;U DO HAVE SOMEONE ELSE?
PLEASE?!?!?!?!?!?!
ANSWER ME!
I DON'T FEEL THE THING LIKE LAST TIME;HAISH
I JUST WANT TO BE WITH YOU BUT YOU ARE JUST AVOIDING?!
IM STRESS UP;ARGH
PLEASE TELL ME WHAT YOU FEEL NOW TOWARDS ME;AH
IM REALLY IN PAIN NOW .
PLEASE?
please?
:(

-heartbroken-
Wawan

just get started;ouh

2007-02-05T13:15:00.000+08:00

hey .long the time never update;yaw
the date is getting closer;too nervous
the day i need to perform infront of the public;ouch

first;
getting ready for my performance;10 march 2oo7
for my group MesMerizMa a.k.a m3
do the best YOU can m3;we rock the stage
haha

second;
i have a family in our team;combination of m3 n D.U.A
coolness
we wil b under one roof;yeah
we will bring up our roof to the top of the sky
n e call ourselves; .FreaKo.tRInItY.
so shoks;hehe

n za'e;well she is now my kak angkat;nt more
she is ATT;bluek

n munishah;well she is my junior .
to be frank she is just like my adek .

n one mre;Ruth
his the best guyfren ever in my life .
w/o him i will be destroyed by many ppl in this world .
WOW

-peace out-
Wawan